Primetime: Robert Pattinson gives a devilish performance as a ‘paedophile-hunting’ TV presenter

“Why don’t you take a seat?” It doesn’t sound like much of a catchphrase, but in the early oughts in the United States, it would have been instantly recognisable as the words of Chris Hansen, the host of To Catch a Predator (2004-07), a reality show in which alleged paedophiles were baited to a house by a decoy (an adult actor posing as a minor). Once the man was there and had disclosed enough about his sordid intentions, the decoy would make an excuse and be replaced by Hansen, who would deliver the line, along with: “I’m Chris Hansen from NBC’s Dateline.”  

Documentary filmmaker Lance Oppenheim’s debut fiction feature finds Hansen (Robert Pattinson) rehearsing his obscene lines – “I will undress you; you will undress me” – log excerpts from the chatroom the target was catfished from. Part Nightcrawler (2014), part American Psycho (2000), Pattinson’s version of Hansen is plastic-fantastic – he’s the kind of man who has to practice his intonation and facial expressions repeatedly, because he’s so used to faking them, he’s not quite sure which ones are real and which ones are put on. He has a family at home, an unhappy wife who he cheats on, and his only interaction with his sons is when he arrives late one night and gets them out of bed to watch a tape of his latest show.  

Hansen is not content with his lot. He envies his prestigious colleague, who reports on military conflicts, and steers his show towards bigger and more sensational stories to compete with ABC’s new hit Lost (2004-2010). In this, he is aided by a team of misfits. Along with his NBC producer Andie Bender (Merritt Wever), there’s the online activist group Perverted Justice, which includes a fake adolescent Del (Phoebe Bridgers), and the nerdish bear-like Xavier (Matthew Maher). They are joined by newbie Dan Plum (Skyler Gisondo) who believes he’s landed his big break, only to find himself being tutored in how to come on to potential molesters. 

Hansen takes Plum under his wing, to some extent, dubbing him “Decoy” Dan. Or at least this is what the ever-optimistic Plum hopes. Hansen is not good with people. His producer feels so under-appreciated she’s being tempted away by a rival show, and he’s further distracted by the imminent revelation of an extra-marital affair he’s in the process of breaking off. A minor nervous breakdown is in the offing. The plastic is melting.  

Primetime has the look of a VHS tape that has been rented out over and over – slack and fuzzy with colours that bleed into each other. Cinematographer David Bolen’s camera is so close to Pattinson’s face we could lick it. The lighting has the pink and blue neon so often seen through rainy motel windows. Given that the first house we see is fake, almost everything thereafter feels like a potential set. Hansen, the film crew, the investigators, everyone is slightly suspect. Has the sleaze rubbed off on them in those chat rooms? How are they good at what they do? Why do they all look like they smell like a bag of socks? What exactly is Xavier doing in his hotel room when Hansen barges in to demand he find a bigger target, a ‘Whale’?  

Oppenheim’s film moves too fast to dig deep into this. For that you might try David Osit’s 2025 documentary Predators (reviewed here), which chronicled Hansen’s rise in more detail and with more context. Primetime consciously remains on the surface. It’s a glib film about superficiality: a one-dimensional portrait of people who have zeal but not seriousness. Except for a brief comment at the beginning by Del, there’s nary a mention of child abuse victims. Child abuse is reduced to a plot device – we’re given fake outrage where genuine rage is warranted. As was the case in every series of To Catch a Predator, we’re presented with a parade of losers and deeply damaged men, whose capture and humiliation is just meat to put through the entertainment machine. Hansen cheerfully compares his show to a form of communal punishment: “there used to be a pillory in every village; now, there’s a television in every living room.”  

Meanwhile, the police are all too happy to wait outside or help with the stings. The search for the bigger fish leads to a town in Texas where the crew improvise a new sting with the hope of capturing their ‘whale.’ The denouement is at once predictable and startling, shocking but not surprising. Character arcs aren’t quite right. Being successful is so important that no one asks, successful at what? Ultimately, the film itself resembles Pattinson’s performance of Hansen’s performance of a human being. It’s an effective imitation, but ultimately, it skids on its own slickness. 

► Primetime is in UK cinemas 30 October.